I've been a Caitlin Doughty fangirl ever since I read her first book Smoke Gets in Your Eyes back in 2014. I was visiting some former co-workers at the Portsmouth Public Library, and I saw it on the display in the non-fiction section, so I made a note to myself to ILL it. The book is about Doughty's life, and her devotion to death. She has worked in a crematory, as a funeral director, and a mortician. In fact, one of her blog posts inspired one of my blog posts earlier this year.
I've always had an interest in forensic science, but I know that most of the stuff on TV is either not real, or very dramatized . I've also always had a preoccupation with Victorian death; mourning jewelry, post-mortem photography, cemeteries from the era, et cetera. I started following her blog, and her YouTube series "Ask a Mortician", as well as her social media. I was hoping that when her second book was published, that she would go on a tour and make it over to the East Coast at some point (she resides in Los Angeles).
I was right! She had an appearance scheduled at Mount Auburn Cemetery in Cambridge, MA! As soon as I saw it advertised on Facebook, I tried to get tickets. BUT, they sold out in record time. I put myself on the wait list, and then finally last week I got an email stating that some new tickets were now available, and I was lucky enough to snag one for myself. So last night, I finally got to meet Caitlin Doughty! I wore my skeleton earrings and my skeleton t-shirt for the occasion.
Doughty has become an advocate for death positivity, and a revolutionary in her industry. She strives to create change in her business by speaking and writing about different cultural beliefs and practices surrounding death. For example, in the US there are very strict standards for opening a funeral home, one being that the mortician must be certified in embalming. But that is kind of discriminatory, because many cultures/religions do not believe in embalming their dead. That standard keeps people from entering the industry who might offer a more appropriate service to those types of cultures and communities.
Similarly, Doughty believes in keeping the process as natural and organic as possible. There is no health or safety reason a body must be embalmed; it has simply become a standard practice. There is also no reason why we must bury the dead in expensive coffins, or purchase headstones. Her own business, Undertaking LA, offers natural burials.
She also helps grieving families advocate for their rights. The rise of the medical industry, and the funeral industry, gradually stripped us of our ways of caring for the dead in our own ways. It used to be a family's own discretion if they wanted to wash the body at home, or possibly have a photographer come so that a mourning mother might have a portrait of her child to cherish, or have a wake in the home for a couple of days following a death, but we have forgotten those ways. Now we leave it to "the professionals", from transporting to washing to memorializing to burying (or cremating). And unfortunately those two industries have convinced us that their way is the only way.
And one of the most interesting tidbits I learned about her is that she is leading the way for more women to enter her industry. Years ago, she was in talks with a major tv network to have her own series about what the life of funeral director/mortician is like. One of the things that turned her off from the idea was how silly they envisioned it; they wanted her to pick up as blind date in a hearse, take the date to an abandoned asylum to go ghost hunting, etc. That's not what her business is actually about. Also, the network told her that she needed a male co-host for the series. When she asked why, they said "Well, we need an expert." She replied "Well, I AM the expert." And then they told her that they didn't think anyone would watch a show about forensics and funerals if it was just a woman hosting it. So she never got her TV series, but it did lead to her side career of writing.
I just started reading her new book From Here to Eternity: Traveling the World to Find the Good Death, so I'll have to review it at a later point. But for now, enjoy the photo of Caitlin admiring my skeleton t-shirt. He has his hand in the hair, and it reads "Slap me some skin!"
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